Jul 25, 2022
With Lisa Lapides Sawicki, Certified Life Coach
Have you ever set a realistic and attainable self improvement goal only to find your progress blocked before you ever achieved that goal? If you find your answer is “yes” to that question, was the obstacle preventing your success within your control? If so, you might be guilty of self sabotage. When a person consciously or unconsciously hinders their own success through destructive words or behavior, that is called self sabotage. We all have moments in our life where something doesn’t turn out as planned, but self sabotage occurs when we get in the way of our own progress. There are many reasons why someone might unknowingly do this. For example, fear of failure can be so overwhelming that it causes a person to quit before someone else sees them fail. For others, the fear of success might be the cause. The thought of actually attaining that long desired goal creates a state of fear or anxiety because now they feel they might not be able to live up to those expectations. There are many reasons why we get in the way of our own progress, but if you know it’s happening you can sometimes stop yourself from sabotaging your chances for success.
My guest today is certified Life Coach,Lisa Lapides Sawicki. We speak with Lisa about what causes us to sabotage ourselves and more importantly how we can learn to overcome these self destructive impulses.
What You’ll Hear on This Episode:
- What is self sabotage?
- What are some examples of self sabotage?
- Can others sabotage you?
- What is the “monkey mind”?
- Can positive self talk help people overcome self sabotage?
- Why do people break others down in their quest to succeed?
- Has Lisa ever self sabotaged?
- How habits can contribute to self sabotage.
- How do people sabotage romantic relationships?
- What is cognitive dissonance?
- How do we learn to stop self sabotaging?
- How do we live a more “normal” life?
Today’s Takeaway: A fear of commitment, low self esteem, or feeling undeserving of happiness or success, are just some of the reasons why we deliberately sabotage ourselves. If you’re always missing out on that dream job, or if that happy long term relationship is just out of reach, maybe it’s time to ask yourself, “Are you the obstacle?” There is nothing shameful in admitting we might be sabotaging ourselves. You may need help in overcoming these behaviors, but think of it as an opportunity to learn and grow so you can finally be happy to live the life you deserve every day. Stop putting things off, stop procrastinating! The future you dream of starts now. Set a realistic and attainable goal for yourself and go after it! Put together a road map outlining each of the steps along your journey to success. Instead of taking actions that undermine your progress, hold yourself accountable by sharing your progress with your support team at every step of the journey. Celebrate every small victory and be proud of your accomplishments. If you do that consistently and enjoy each small step daily, you’ll be well on your way to realizing your dream. Remember, every day is a gift and the gift we get from changing our behavior to ensure that we accomplish our goals is a gift that will keep on giving. You too can realize your dreams and build the life you’ve always dreamed of for yourself. I’m Florine Mark and that’s “Today’s Takeaway.”
Quotes:
- “Self sabotage is when we actively, or passively, or unconsciously, think thoughts and take actions, or no actions, that absolutely sabotage our success.” - Lisa
- “For some people they really have regrets, big regrets, when they don’t account for something that they have continued to self sabotage their whole life.” - Lisa
- “It’s not about the outside world; it’s working with who you are.” - Lisa
- “The inner talk is our world.” - Lisa
- “It all starts with the inner talk.” - Lisa
- “It takes a really strong person to not fall prey to the criticisms and the judgements of other people.” - Lisa
- “I can have the feast and the fun without the excess.” - Lisa
- “Insecurity is why people will self sabotage a loving relationship.” - Lisa
- “Make a custom design plan that’s doable for you.” - Lisa
- “Mistakes are lessons to be learned.” - Lisa
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